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<blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 2963803" data-attributes="member: 14320"><p><strong>You Might Be A Redneck If . . .</strong></p><p></p><p>. . . you think a lavatory is a breed of dog.</p><p></p><p>. . . you’ve ever taken a date flowers you’ve stole from a cemetery.</p><p></p><p>. . . you’ve ever relieved yourself from a moving vehicle.</p><p></p><p>. . . you use old auto parts as a boat anchor.</p><p></p><p>. . . your pickup truck and wife are the same age.</p><p></p><p>. . . your favorite cologne is Deep Woods Off.</p><p></p><p>. . . you’ve ever given livestock as a wedding present.</p><p></p><p>. . . you think safe sex means putting on the emergency brake.</p><p></p><p>. . . people hear your car a long time before they see it.</p><p></p><p>. . . your 23-channel CB radio is used to communicate with your family.</p><p></p><p>. . . your bridal veil was made of window screen.</p><p></p><p>. . . you call your boss “dude.â€</p><p></p><p>. . . you repaint your pink flamingo every spring... but not your house.</p><p></p><p>. . . you have ever carried leftovers home in your handbag.</p><p></p><p>. . . you think an oil change involves a comb and a bottle of Vitalis.</p><p></p><p>. . . you whistle to get the attention of your waiter or waitress.</p><p></p><p>. . . your college graduation ceremony includes parallel parking an 18-wheeler.</p><p></p><p>. . . you think ribs come from Europe.</p><p></p><p>. . . your toothbrush is a hand-me-down.</p><p></p><p>. . . the nearest liquor store is brewing in your basement.</p><p></p><p>. . . your Friday nights consist of lots of Budwieser and a mechanical bull.</p><p></p><p>. . . you have used a potato peeler to remove a corn.</p><p></p><p>. . . the Marlboro man is your idol.</p><p></p><p>. . . you see a sign that says “dip in road†and you stop to see what flavor it is.</p><p></p><p>. . . you think a canopy goes under the bed instead of over it.</p><p></p><p>. . . you’ve ever had a conversation about truck tires that lasted more than an hour.</p><p></p><p>. . . you’ve ever fished from over a fence.</p><p></p><p>. . . you have ever taken lawn furniture to a drive-in.</p><p></p><p>. . . your state senator is willingly photographed with no shirt and a leather vest on a Harley, but refuses to take a Breathalyzer test.</p><p></p><p>. . . you think virgin wool comes from ugly sheep.</p><p></p><p>. . . you keep catfish in your aquarium.</p><p></p><p>. . . you think truffles are a brand of potato chips.</p><p></p><p>. . . you’ve ever bought a used cap.</p><p></p><p>. . . you know all the verses to the “Hee Haw†song.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="melody, post: 2963803, member: 14320"] [B]You Might Be A Redneck If . . .[/B] . . . you think a lavatory is a breed of dog. . . . you’ve ever taken a date flowers you’ve stole from a cemetery. . . . you’ve ever relieved yourself from a moving vehicle. . . . you use old auto parts as a boat anchor. . . . your pickup truck and wife are the same age. . . . your favorite cologne is Deep Woods Off. . . . you’ve ever given livestock as a wedding present. . . . you think safe sex means putting on the emergency brake. . . . people hear your car a long time before they see it. . . . your 23-channel CB radio is used to communicate with your family. . . . your bridal veil was made of window screen. . . . you call your boss “dude.†. . . you repaint your pink flamingo every spring... but not your house. . . . you have ever carried leftovers home in your handbag. . . . you think an oil change involves a comb and a bottle of Vitalis. . . . you whistle to get the attention of your waiter or waitress. . . . your college graduation ceremony includes parallel parking an 18-wheeler. . . . you think ribs come from Europe. . . . your toothbrush is a hand-me-down. . . . the nearest liquor store is brewing in your basement. . . . your Friday nights consist of lots of Budwieser and a mechanical bull. . . . you have used a potato peeler to remove a corn. . . . the Marlboro man is your idol. . . . you see a sign that says “dip in road†and you stop to see what flavor it is. . . . you think a canopy goes under the bed instead of over it. . . . you’ve ever had a conversation about truck tires that lasted more than an hour. . . . you’ve ever fished from over a fence. . . . you have ever taken lawn furniture to a drive-in. . . . your state senator is willingly photographed with no shirt and a leather vest on a Harley, but refuses to take a Breathalyzer test. . . . you think virgin wool comes from ugly sheep. . . . you keep catfish in your aquarium. . . . you think truffles are a brand of potato chips. . . . you’ve ever bought a used cap. . . . you know all the verses to the “Hee Haw†song. [/QUOTE]
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