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Message: <blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 3606210" data-attributes="member: 14320">A man walks into a doctor's office and the doctor says to him," I've got some good news and some bad news.""Tell me the good news first," the patient says."The good news is that your penis is going to be two incheslonger and an inch wider,"the doctor replies."That's great!" says the patient." What's the bad news?"The doctor says, "It's malignant."_____A college student picked up his date at her parents home.He'd scraped together every cent he had to take her to afancy restaurant. To his dismay, she ordered almosteverything expensive on the menu. Appetizers, lobster,champagne. . . the works.Finally he asked her, "Does your Mother feed you like thisat home?""No," she said, "but my Mother's not looking to get laid."_____A gynaecologist examines a lesbian and remarked "Madam that is the cleanest vagina I have ever seen"She replied "Thank you, I have a woman in twice a week !"_____Do you realize that in about 40 years, we'll have thousands ofold ladies running around with tattoos?_____A man and his wife are screwing. Fifteen minutes has passed, thirtyminutes, then 45 minutes. Sweat is pouring off both of them. After afew more moments, the wife comments "Can't you think of anyone either?"_____MisunderstoodA man walks up to an attractive woman at a bar."Do you want to dance?" asks the man."I don't care much for this song and wouldn't be caught dead dancingwith you anyway," snips the woman."Oh, excuse me, you must have misunderstood -- I said you look FAT inthose pants!!"_____On their wedding night, a young couple finally retired to their hotelroom. After making her preparations, the bride left the bathroom tofind the bridegroom on his knees in front of the bed."What are you doing?" she asked."I'm praying for guidance," answered the young man."I'll take care of that," she replied. "You better pray for endurance."</blockquote>